【某人的英语论文】【社论】为何更多千禧一代避谈性事 [美国媒体]

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‘There isn’t really anything magical about it’: Why more millennials are avoiding sex？

“这真的没啥神奇之处”
——为何更多千禧一代避谈性事？

Sam Wei, a 26-year-old financial analyst in Chicago, has not had sex since her last relationship ended 18 months ago. She makes out with guys sometimes, and she likes to cuddle.

自从18个月前结束上一段恋爱关系以来，26岁的芝加哥金融分析师魏珊一直没有过性爱。她偶尔会和男人亲热，她喜欢拥抱。

“To me, there’s more intimacy with having someone there next to you that you can rely on without having to have sex,” she said. “I don’t want to do anything that would harm the relationship and be something that we can’t come back from.”

“对我来说，没有比身边有个你可以信赖但不需要发生性关系的人更亲密了，”她说，“我不想做任何可能损害彼此关系、让我们不能回到从前的事情。”

Sam Wei, 26, finds “intellectual conversation more stimulating and more pleasurable than having sex sometimes.” (Courtesy of Sam Wei)

魏珊26岁，她发现，“充满智慧的交谈有时候比做爱更加刺激，更加令人愉悦”。（魏珊授权引用）

It’s a less sexy time to be young than it used to be, despite millennials’ reputation as bed-hoppers frolicking like the characters on “Girls.” A study published Tuesday in the journal Archives of Sexual Behavior finds that younger millennials — born in the 1990s — are more than twice as likely to be sexually inactive in their early 20s as the previous generation was. Even older millennials are more sexually active than this younger group is.

尽管千禧一代以与“姑娘们”逢场作戏、游戏人生而着称，但年轻人做爱的次数比以往更少了。期刊《性行为档案》在星期二发表的一份研究发现，20世纪90年代出生的年轻的千禧一代和前一代人相比，20多岁的时候在性爱方面的不活跃程度超过两倍。甚至年纪更长一点的千禧一代都比这批年轻人在性爱方面更为活跃。

Recent research also shows that, overall, millennials — people born between the early 1980s and 2000 — have fewer sexual partners than baby boomers and those in Generation X, the group immediately preceding them.

最近的研究也表明，总的来说，千禧一代——即在20世纪80年代初到2000年之间出生的人——相对于婴儿潮一代以及X一代来说，拥有更少的性伴侣。

Granted, the vast majority of young adults are still having sex, but an increasing number of them appear to be standing on the sidelines.

的确，大多数年轻人仍然有性生活，但他们中越来越多的人似乎很少涉足性爱。

Delaying sex is not necessarily bad, experts say: Being intentional about when to have sex can lead to stronger relationships in the long run. The trend may also reflect that women feel more empowered to say no, said Stephanie Coontz, director of research at the Council on Contemporary Families.

延迟性行为并不一定是坏事，从长远来看，关注何时进行性生活有助于建立更为稳固的男女关系。当代家庭理事会研究主任史蒂芬妮•孔茨说，这个趋势也反映了女性觉得更加强大，可以说不了。

“As people have gotten much more accepting of all sorts of forms of consensual sex, they’ve also gotten more picky about what constitutes consent,” Coontz said. “We are far less accepting of pressured sex.”

“随着人们越来越接受各种两情相愿的性行为，他们对于何为两情相悦也更加挑剔”，孔茨说，“我们越发不能接受强迫性的性行为了。”

But some experts are concerned that the drop-off reflects the difficulty some young people are having in forming deep romantic connections. They cite other reasons for putting off sex, including pressure to succeed, social lives increasingly conducted on-screen, unrealistic expectations of physical perfection encouraged by dating apps and wariness over date rape.

但有些专家担心，这种下降趋势反映了有些年轻人难以形成深厚的浪漫关系。他们列举了推迟性行为的其他原因，包括取得成功的压力，越来越视频化的社交生活，约会程序鼓励人们对完美现实的不切实际的期望，以及对约会时遭强奸的担心。

‘Anti-sexual’ communication

与性爱无关的沟通方式

Noah Patterson, 18, likes to sit in front of several screens simultaneously: a work project, a YouTube clip, a video game. To shut it all down for a date or even a one-night stand seems like a waste. “For an average date, you’re going to spend at least two hours, and in that two hours I won’t be doing something I enjoy,” he said.

诺亚•帕特森18岁，喜欢同时坐在几台电脑前面；一台是工作项目屏幕，一台是YouTube剪辑屏幕，另一台是视频游戏屏幕。为了约会或者一夜情把这些屏幕都关掉似乎就是一种浪费。 “一次约会平均会花掉至少两个小时，在这两个小时里我不能做任何我喜欢的事情，”他说道。

It’s not that he doesn’t like women. “I enjoy their companionship, but it’s not a significant part of life,” said Patterson, a Web designer in Bellingham, Wash.

这并不是说他不喜欢女人。“我喜欢她们的陪伴，但这不是生活中最重要的组成部分，”来自华盛顿州贝林汉市的网页设计师帕特森说道。

He has never had sex, although he likes porn. “I’d rather be watching YouTube videos and making money.” Sex, he said, is “not going to be something people ask you for on your résumé.”

虽然他喜欢看色情片，但从来没有过性爱。“我宁愿看YouTube视频和赚钱。”他说，性关系“并非人们要求你在简历上说明的东西。”

That attitude does not surprise Helen Fisher, a biological anthropologist at Rutgers University and chief scientific adviser to the dating site Match.com.

这种态度并没有让罗格斯大学生物人类学家、约会网站Match.com的首席科学顾问海伦•费舍尔感到吃惊。

“It’s a highly motivated, ambitious generation,” she said. “A lot of them are afraid that they’ll get into something they can’t get out of and they won’t be able to get back to their desk and keep studying.”

“这是动机强烈、积极进取的一代，”她说。 “他们中许多人担心进入某种状态后就出不去，不能回到书桌前继续学习了。

According to the new report, 15 percent of 20- to 24-year-olds have not had sex since turning 18, up from 6 percent in the early 1990s. And a study published in the same journal last year found that although millennials are more accepting of extramarital sex than earlier generations, they reported fewer sexual partners than any group since the 1960s — an average of eight, compared with 11 for boomers and 10 for Generation X.

根据最新的报告，在20到24岁的年轻人当中，15%的人18岁以后就没有性行为，而在20世纪90年代初出生的年轻人中这一比例为6％。去年在同一期刊发表的一份调查报告发现： 虽然相对于前几代人来说，千禧一代更能接受婚外性行为，但他们报告拥有的性伴侣比20世纪60年代以来的各个群组都更少：千禧一代平均8个，而婴儿潮一代平均11个，X一代平均10个。



The decline seems likely to continue: According to the latest data from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, the portion of high school students who have had sex fell last year to 41 percent from 54 percent in 1991 and about 47 percent in 2013. The portion who reported sleeping with multiple partners also declined, from about 19 percent in 1991 to about 12 percent last year.
 
这种下降的趋势似乎可能会继续：根据疾病控制与预防中心的最新数据，高中学生中有过性生活的比例从1991年的54％、2013年的约为47％下降到了去年的41％。据报道，和多个性伙伴睡过觉的比例也在下降，从1991年的约19％下降到了去年的约12％。


 
​Among millennials, the effects are most dramatic among those born in the mid-1990s and later — the first cohort to come of age when smartphones were ubiquitous.

在千禧世代中，这些影响在90年代中期及以后出生的人当中最为显着，也就是智能手机广泛使用时出生的第一群人。

“This was the group that really started to communicate by screens more and by talking to their friends in person less,” said researcher Jean Twenge, lead author of the two studies.

这两个研究项目的主要作者让•特恩格说：“正是这群人真正开始更多地通过屏幕进行交流，而与朋友们亲自交流更少了。”

So has sex declined because people are not meeting in person? Perhaps in part. But online life can also affect offline life in more subtle ways, especially when potential mates can disappear forever with the swipe of a thumb.

那么，性生活次数下降是因为没有亲自会面吗？也许在一定程度上的确如此。但网络生活也可以以更微妙的方式影响着线下的生活，尤其是通过拇指的滑动，潜在的伴侣可以会永远消失的时候。

“It ends up putting a lot of importance on physical appearance, and that, I think, is leaving out a large section of the population,” said Twenge, who teaches psychology at San Diego State University. “For a lot of folks who are of average appearance, marriage and stable relationships was where they were having sex.” Unlike in face-to-face meetings where “you can seduce someone with your charm,” she said, dating apps are “leaving some people with fewer choices and they might be more reluctant to search for partners at all.”

圣地亚哥州立大学心理学教师特文治说：“这说明外表起着非常重要的作用，而且我认为这使很多人对性爱退避三舍。”“对于很多外貌一般的人来说，婚姻和稳定的关系决定了他们做爱的地方。”在面对面约会时，“你可以用魅力勾引人，” 她说，相反，约会程序“使有些人的选择更少，他们可能更不愿意寻找性伙伴。”

It does not help that many millennials are relatively unfamiliar with the kind of down time it takes to really get to know a partner.

这对许多千禧一代并无助益，他们相对不熟悉如何利用停机时间去真正了解一个伴侣。

“The nature of communication now is anti-sexual,” said Norman Spack, associate clinical professor of pediatrics at Harvard Medical School. “People are not spending enough time alone just together. There’s another gorilla in the room: It’s whatever is turned on electronically.”

哈佛医学院儿科临床副教授诺曼·斯帕克说：“现在沟通的本质就是反性爱。 人们没能花费足够长的时间在一起。房间里还有一只大猩猩，那就是任何处于开机状态的电子产品。”

Alexandra Wolff, 19, had hoped to find romance in college. In high school, she and her friends were so focused on schoolwork that they did not date. But as a freshman last year at George Washington University, she found that between meeting new friends, attending classes and participating in extracurricular activities, she still did not have time.

亚历山德拉•沃尔夫19岁，希望在大学里找到浪漫的爱情。高中时，她和朋友们都专注于学业而没有约会。但作为乔治•华盛顿大学去年入学的新生，她发现除了会见新朋友、上课和参加课外活动，她还是没有时间。

“I don’t involve myself in the scene of frat parties and hookup culture … but it seems like every other option is so time-consuming and very hard to seek out,” said Wolff, who has never had sex. “It’s not like I’m saving myself for anything; it’s more like, I’ve been busy.”

沃尔夫从来没有过性爱经历。她说：“我没有到过姐妹联谊会和文化同好会的现场……但似乎其他每种选择都非常耽搁时间，很难抽出时间参加。这倒不是我另有所图，而是因为一直很忙。”

At Tulane University, in New Orleans, Wolff’s high school classmate Claudia W., 19, feels like an odd duck in a sea of Tinder users. She wants what she calls an “old-fashioned” relationship, leading to marriage and kids. But fellow students are into “very casual one-night stands, going to bars and going home with someone,” she said.

在新奥尔良的杜兰大学，沃尔夫的19岁高中同学克劳迪亚• W.作为手机交友软件Tinder的众多用户之一，感觉自己就像一个怪物。她希望得到她称之为“老式”的恋爱关系，最终走向结婚生子。但她说，同学们都进入了“非常随意的一夜情，去酒吧，然后和人回家”的状态。

Claudia, who did not want her last name used because “I don’t want all my professors reading about how I’m a virgin,” said her parents worry.

克劳迪亚不想暴露自己的姓氏，因为“我不想让所有教授都读到我为何还是一名处女，”她说她的父母很担心。

“They always ask me: ‘Are you against relationships? Why don’t you have a boyfriend?’ My mom — she hooked up all the time in college — she’s like, ‘I would still love you, but are you gay?’ But for me, it’s not anything about chastity or fear of sex. … I’m just like, ‘Eh, it’ll happen.’ ”

“他们常常问我：‘你是反对性关系吗？为什么还没有男朋友？’我妈妈上大学时经常约会，她说：‘我仍会爱你的，但你是同性恋吗？’但对我来说，这与贞洁和性恐惧没有任何关系……我只能说：‘呃，以后会有的。’”

Wary of ‘catching feelings’

警惕“上当的感觉”

Millennials have been called the most cautious generation — the first to grow up with car seats and bike helmets, the first not allowed to walk to school or go to the playground alone.

千禧一代被称为最谨慎的一代——伴随着汽车座椅和自行车头盔长大的第一代人，不允许独自步行去学校或操场的第一代人。

The sense of caution sometimes manifests itself as a heightened awareness of emotional pitfalls. For example, some young people speak disparagingly of the messy emotional state love and lust can engender, referring to it as “catching feelings.”

这种谨慎的感觉有时表现为对情感陷阱的清醒认识。例如，有些年轻人对恋爱和情欲带来的情感状态方面的麻烦表示蔑视，称之为“上当的感觉”。

This generation has also grown up in an age when it is possible to inflict suffering in ways that are both hidden and horrifyingly public, such as cyberbullying or posting compromising pictures online. In such an environment, young people have developed what some see as necessary defenses and others view as thin skin.

这一代人也成长于这样一个时代，造成痛苦的方式既是隐藏的，也是公开得可怕的，比如网络欺凌或在网络上上传有损名誉的照片等。在这种环境下，年轻人们已经形成了有人认为是必要的，但在其他人看来是神经过敏的防卫措施。

“On college campuses, you see older people scratching their heads about ‘safe spaces.’ ” Twenge said. “That’s about emotional safety, this new idea of words being more harmful,” referring to “trigger warnings” and other terms college-age people use to talk about potentially trauma-inducing stimuli.

“在大学校园里，你能看到年长的人们为“安全空间”抓破了头。”Twenge说道，“这个词与‘情感安全’有关，这是一种新观点，用来谈论更加有害的语词，指的是处于上大学年龄段的人们用于谈论可能引起创伤的潜在刺激的“触发警告”和其他术语。”

Meanwhile, in efforts to counteract hookup and drinking culture, some campuses have begun instigating “yes means yes” rules stipulating that each step of a sexual encounter requires verbal consent. For some, staying away altogether can feel less treacherous.

同时，为了消除泡妞和饮酒文化，有些校园开始煽动“是就是是”的规则，规定性接触的每一步都需要言语上的同意。对于有些人来说，完全不呆在一起就可以更少感受到背叛。

Noah Patterson, 18, has never had sex. “I’d rather be watching YouTube videos and making money.” (Courtesy of Noah Patterson)

诺亚·帕特森18岁，从来没有过性生活。 “我宁愿去看YouTube视频和赚钱。”（诺亚•帕特森授权引用）


For his part, Leo Fusco, a 25-year-old construction worker and subcontractor in Oakland, Calif., has refrained from sex in part because he is repelled by the hookup culture.

对加利福尼亚州奥克兰市25岁的建筑工人和分包商列奥•福斯科而言，他在一定程度上已经远离了性生活，这部分是由于他被泡妞文化所排斥。

“I’ve overheard conversations where every detail was given — ‘We were in this position for this long, and then we were in that position’ — and that’s a major turnoff for me,” he said. “There’s a lot of people my age who have no filter in terms of how they express themselves in public.”

“我曾听到过提供每个细节的对话——‘我们在这个地方呆这么长一段时间，然后到另一个地方’——这是最让我心烦的东西，”他说。“有很多我这个年龄的人，对如何在公众面前表达自己口不择言。”

Isn’t he curious about what sex is like? “I’m curious on a physical level, like I’m curious about how a new sandwich would taste, but it’s not like a driving curiosity.” Besides, he said, “I don’t particularly like not being in control of myself.”

难道他对性究竟为何物不好奇吗？ “我所好奇的是在物质层面，就像我对新的三明治味道如何很好奇一样，但这不是我最好奇的东西。”此外，他接着说，“我特别不喜欢不能自制。”

To Spack, the Harvard professor, that is sad. “Everyone’s missing out on a good time,” he said.

对哈佛大学教授斯帕克来说，这是令人担忧的。他说：“每个人都在最好的时光错过了对方。”

But Fisher, the Rutgers anthropologist, is not worried. “It’s probably a good thing,” she said. Noting that baby boomers were known not only for free love but also for high divorce rates, she added, “I think [taking it slowly] is going to lead to better first marriages.”

但罗格斯大学的人类学家费什并不担心。她说：“这也许是一件好事。”她注意到婴儿潮一代不仅因为自由恋爱而着称，同时也因为离婚率高而知名。”她补充说：“我认为（慢慢来）会产生更好的初婚。”

In the end, she predicted, biology will prevail. “Sex is a powerful drive, and so is romantic love. . . . The sex system is way below the cortex. It’s way below the limbic system,” on a level with thirst and hunger.

最后，她预测，生物因素会最终获胜。“性是一种强大的驱动力，浪漫的爱也是这样……性系统位于大脑皮层以下，在边缘系统下面”，与口渴和饥饿处于同一水平。”

“They’ll get to the sex,” she said. “I’m positive of that.”

“他们会得到性爱的，”她说，“我对此持乐观态度。”